Matthew 19            February 2,  2015

Those who have suffered through a divorce know that it always leaves some ragged edges.  I must confess that there are times (when the couple aren't Christians) when it is probably better to divorce than to stay married, but that doesn't make it less of a sin.  Jesus very emphatically said that divorce is sin, unless one of the partners has violated their vow and become unfaithful.   Even then, it is recommended that we stay together if at all possible.    If we were listening to Jesus in chapter 18 speak about forgiveness, then we know that it's possible.

Not everyone should be married.  Some people are better suited to the independent life.  That's certainly not a sin or a shortcoming.  In fact, it can be a great advantage.    So, we should give very careful thought to whether or not marriage is something God intends for us, BEFORE we get deeply involved with the opposite sex.  

A good pre-marital counseling program can help us determine if the person we are dating is the right match for a lifetime commitment.   It's best not to rush the process, make a very good decision up front, that way you avoid many arguments and lessen the possibility of divorce.

Divorce affects children, both sets of parents and friends on both sides of the marriage.   The ragged edges of divorce often create traumatic experiences in high school.   Children lose the benefit of advice from both parents, and even when both parents are involved they often bicker, which makes it even harder for the young person.

God said that he hates divorce in Malachi 2:16.  That doesn't mean He hates us, I think He hates what divorce does to everyone involved.   And when a church leader gets divorced, it seems to be a far larger circle of people affected.    Divorce hurts us, so consider carefully who you marry.   No wonder God said He hates it.

What if you are already married and then realize that the person you married isn't the right one?   Well, unless it's an issue of unfaithfulness or abuse, it's better for you to ask God to change you and your partner to make the two of you more compatible.   Nothing is impossible for God, and He is able to bless and keep you, and fill your life with significance even if you went outside His will to marry someone.    Stay in your marriage, and pray that God will work in you so that you are a better partner.

PR